If October weren't my birth month I'd be more inclined to lament the loss of September, which blew right past me. I have no idea where it went. No. Freakin'. Clue. Here's a not-a-fortune I saw on kind over matter, one of the sites I follow. (If you follow this link, you can download a free October desktop wallpaper calendar with a lovely saying from kind over matter. The women who run that site really are the best.)
"Approach all areas of life with a bold enthusiasm."
I've received a few cookie inserts since my last round-up:
"You will enjoy good health and financial independence." — All I can say to that is, "Ha!"
"Every person is the architect of his or her own fortune." — When I posted this not-a-fortune on Facebook (ooh, speaking of Facebook, how many of you are going to see the movie based on its founding?) one of my fb friends commented that she had received the very same not-a-fortune herself: "Scam!" In the same thread, my friend V commented that she received "Something wonderful is about to happy," which appeared on the blog a few weeks ago. I think this very unscientific sample proves these little inserts are not always original.
"A secret admirer will soon send you a sign of affection." — I will refrain from comment on this one, other than to say, "Creepy McCreeperson."
I also have two cookie inserts stashed away with the above three that I think belong to The Geologist. It only makes sense given the fact that we were together each time I had Chinese food. The first one reads, "A truly great person never puts away the simplicity of a child." I know The Geologist received this not-a-fortune, as I recall discussing it with him. The second reads, "Endurance and persistence will be rewarded," and it is taking every ounce of strength that I have not to add "in bed" at the end the way Single Blonde in the City would want me to.
My parents (everybody's favorite parents?) saved two cookie inserts for me, one fortune and one not. My mother brought them to me when she came to visit last weekend. She wasn't sure which was hers and which was my father's, but it doesn't matter to me because I think both inserts apply to each of them.
"If you can't excel with talent, triumph with effort."
"You will soon create a favorable impression on someone."
My friends have shared fantastic cookie inserts with me the past two weeks. All the way from CA, my niece Emily said this about her fortune cookie: "It tastes like cookie! It's good!" Her not-a-fortune, which was spot on:
"You have a fine capacity for the enjoyment of life."
Emily's mother's not-a-fortune was the same one I blogged about following SBITC's grandparents' memorial service:
"If you continually give, you will continually have."
Emily's father's cookie insert read,
"You should do well at making money and holding on to it,"
and those of you who are regular Not-a-Fortune readers may recognize a certain materiality to his cookie inserts, more of which can be found here.
One of Not-a-Fortune's favorite friends, Bea Dazzler, and her husband, Princess Quite-A-Lot, received these winners:
"While you're carrying a grudge, others are out dancing."
(To which Bea Dazzler said, "Um, what?")
wants to know "Who writes this crap?" and thinks he "win[s] on the lame scale":
"Don't put all your eggs in one basket."
(Insert pregnancy-themed joke about eggs and basket, as Bea Dazzler is currently carrying Princess Quite-A-Lot's baby.)
An ATX friend who has been dealing with a bit of an unsettled situation had a fortuitous lunch a few days ago when he broke open his fortune cookie to reveal an insert that read,
"You will soon emerge victorious in the maze you've been travelling in."
Some of my Twitter friends also received interesting cookie inserts since my last round-up:
Julie, aka @queenofpink, was told "A thrilling time is in store for you," to which she responded, "Thrill me, baby." Her daughter's fortune: "Your planning will bring rich rewards."
Finally, Lauren's not-a-fortune told her, "A truly creative person rids him or herself of all self-imposed limitations."
And so, with that, I wish you a happy my birth month! Er, I mean, happy October!