This month has been (and continues to be) ridiculously busy for me. August promises an even crazier schedule. I have a backlog of fortune cookie-related post materials, but unfortunately I lack the necessary time to research and write them right now. Look forward to upcoming posts on Lone Star beer bottle caps (I really will get to that, I swear!) and - I don't think you're ready for this - taco-shaped Mexican fortune cookies. In the meantime, a big thank you to my friends who have shared these gems with me over the past week or two:
"Keep your goals away from the trolls."
UnScurvyGirl sent me the link to this not-a-fortune, labeled a "Fortune Win" by Fail Blog (tagline: "Helping you feel better about yourself every day").
Her husband, Mr. Fabulous, sent me the link to this not-a-fortune, which someone actually received:
"On the right track, means need to run even faster, or got run over."
(Follow the link above and read the comments for a good laugh. Well...a laugh. Or an eye roll.)
My friends Myrtle and Blonde Birdie enjoyed some Chinese takeout a couple of nights ago, after which Myrtle opened her fortune cookie only to find "the most despondent not-a-fortune I have ever gotten":
"Hope for the best but prepare for the worst."
Blonde Birdie's actual fortune, though, was much more promising:
"People will find it difficult to resist your propositions."
(I propose you click on the link above and visit her website. She has fun, fabulous goodies for sale and I'm sure you will find something you'll love. And in case you're wondering, I know the words propose and proposition aren't synonyms. But they're close enough. And I'm tired. Just visit her website. And buy something. You know you want to.)
After my last post about snarky fortune cookies, a colleague of mine shared these goodies with me, from the Archie McPhee Seattle photostream on flickr:
As the caption describes, each cookie contains one of hundreds of different "whimsical fortune[s]." Examples include: "Your lost button will end up in somebody's cupcake" and "On the eighteenth day of every month, a flower will grow where you step."
Have you read my friend Abbey's blog, 3 Kids and a Cocktail? You really should. It's hilarious. She's hilarious. I could tell you all about her and her kids and her husband who's in the military and deployed for the twelfth time in nine years (clearly I'm exaggerating, but not by much), but then you wouldn't have as much of a reason to visit her blog. And you should visit it. Here are some of their recent cookie inserts, which are spot-on, if I do say so myself.
"It is much wiser to take advice than to give it." (Received by LP, 5 yrs old)
"It is much easier to be critical than to be correct." (Received by DP, 7 yrs old)
"It's fun being a kid." (Received by AP, 11 yrs old)
And Abbey's own not-a-fortune:
"You don't get in life what you want; you get in life what you are," which prompted her to comment, "Touche, world. Tou-che."
And finally, I'll end this post with a not-a-fortune (two, actually) and an interesting observation from G, who recently dined at San Antonio's Wok on Wheels. Do you notice anything unusual about the cookie inserts in this photo, both of which come from the same dining establishment?
"Birds are entangled by their feet and men by their tongues."
"People who are late are often happier than those who have to wait for them."
Did I say I was going to end with G's observation? I lied. I'm letting you guess what it is by asking you to identify what it is that's unusual about the inserts pictured above. :)